Limericks
by James A. Divine

 If you're at home in bed and feel lame
and you're feeling a strong urge to game
if you're hungry for cheese
and greasy goodness would please
then it's time for some pizza and MAME!

There was a young boy from Ames
who loved his video games,
but one day he thought "I need some cash"
so he moved to the north just like a flash
and his old house went up in flames

A man once worked for Ortho
he was feeling rather poor, though
he said "this is enough"
then he packed up his stuff
and by then he had moved to the North, oh.

As I strangled the chicken with glee
a wondrous new thought entered me.
Why sit and kill birds?
when there exist herds
in the country to strangle for free.

If you're hungry for food there's no need to be fickle,
nor is it required to use hammer or sickle.
Instead, just stroll down to the neighborhood store
where the shopkeeper tells you his tales and old lore
and then buy yourself a loaf of pumpernickel!

When one's mind is too burnt out to code
it may be best to lighten one's load.
One should do something fun.
One should then, once begun,
not forget to get back on the road!

In case you are wondering, James A. Divine is a very good friend of mine.  He lives in Minnesota now (Originally from Iowa).  He would be happy to write you a limerick of your own for $5.  Please e-mail him at jdivine@gmail.com for more information about your very own limerick!!